[July 5, 2017] In early 2004 on the outskirts of Baghdad during one of our firefights with insurgents, a calm voice came over the radio describing the critical situation in matter-of-fact tone. U.S. Army Captain Steve Bates1 had learned as a Boy Scout that staying calm helped when others were losing their composure. That was also his secret to confronting bullies as a child and as a leader.
All of us boys were taught growing up to never be a bully. We were told to never pick a fight with someone smaller or weaker than you; otherwise you were no good. I had my share of fights, lost many but always had my dignity and respect that I wouldn’t back down no matter the odds or pick on someone weaker (like a girl). To this day, I have an ingrained aversion to bullies; those who would take advantage of others or of circumstances.
In Rudolph W. Giuliani’s book Leadership, one of the most read chapters is called Stand Up to Bullies. He tells several stories about how he stood up to various bullies – usually leaders of large organizations – that threatened New York City by taking advantage of everyday citizens. My personal favorite is how he overcame a threat to strike by the Metropolitan Transit Authority in 1999.
The MTA agency’s contract was due to expire and they had said they would walk off the job if a contract was not in place to the union’s liking. It was against the law for public employees to strike but previous administrations had overlooked it. Of course, shutting down NYC’s mass transit would have created chaos in the big city. Mayor Giuliani worked with Judge Pesce to issue an injunction against a strike and hefty personal fines if they did. The union settled.
Stay calm, have a plan, and don’t overreach are some of the mainstay’s of fighting bullies. A bully’s most effective tool is his threat to others; it scares people and makes them capitulate quickly. Like Major Giuliani, the best thing is to call their threats and always keep them on the defensive.
I once had a First Lieutenant threaten to resign his officer commission if my unit was to deploy into combat. His reasoning didn’t matter because it was his duty to go to war with the outfit regardless of his personal obligations or beliefs. I agreed with him and immediately wrote his Letter of Resignation to the U.S. Army, right then and there. I had him sign it and I then accepted it. He was discharged a month later.
I found out later from his buddies that they never suspected the command would go through with his threat. It never came up again. Leaders do the right thing; not always popular but always right.
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- Captain Bates, commander of our Engineer headquarters company and Convoy Commander at the time, was in the fight of his life. But his voice was calm and unhurried, an oddity in the middle of a fight but it inspired his men to remain in control of the situation and ultimately prevail.