[November 20, 2025] Yesterday was the viewing, and today is the funeral of another good friend of mine. I’m blessed to know many good people—those very same folks who would drop everything and help me if I truly needed assistance. Those are the kinds of people anyone would want to be around. The young man was 36 years old. It’s our responsibility to attend funerals. I’ll be there.
As regular readers of my blog know, I believe we have a moral obligation to attend the funerals of people we know and even those we don’t know. Just imagine being the person in a casket and no one shows up. Sure, that person wouldn’t understand. But deep down, we know we didn’t show up, and that should shame us enough to motivate us to attend future funerals.
I attend a few dozen funerals each year. Nearly all are Veterans who have passed away. It doesn’t matter whether I knew the Veteran well or not; I will be there. And I’m sure that if the roles were reversed, they would be at my funeral. Funerals are our last chance to say “goodbye.” Use that opportunity. You only get one chance to give your final salute.
Be like the Arlington Ladies whom I wrote about last month. They are volunteers who attend funeral services at Arlington National Cemetery to make sure no Soldier, Sailor, Airman, or Coast Guardsman is buried alone. Despite the decline in participation in voluntary organizations, the Arlington Ladies’ group is growing and becoming stronger. I believe one reason is the moral duty not to let a funeral go unattended.
Even when you don’t want to, or it is unpopular, doing the right thing is at the core of maturity and respect.
Attending a funeral might not seem significant to you, but it means a lot to someone else. Is it inconvenient? Yes. Is going to a funeral uncomfortable and awkward? Yes. There’s nothing heroic or brave about attending a funeral, but I do it. Being with the deceased person’s family at the funeral home or church can be tough.
Because of my military job, I attended many funerals and memorial services—hundreds of them. That was the saddest part of my work, but I went not out of obligation or career duty, but because it was the right thing to do. I looked into the eyes of the family members and spoke good words about the person who had passed away. I learned that lesson early: you may not want to be there, but I can assure you, no one does.
Many parents, spouses, and various relatives and friends of the deceased have expressed their gratitude that I took the time to be there with them. Going to a funeral of someone you know or a relative of someone you know sends a message that you respect the deceased or appreciate their family. You can never fully get used to attending a funeral. The emotions are always present, often with tears on the sleeve and handkerchiefs. It’s tough.
Nevertheless, it is our responsibility to attend funerals.
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Many will ask “Why do we need to attend funerals.” I think part of the answer is what Gen. Satterfield claims in his article (and he is right). But he only hints at another issue and that is that we will miss a one-time opportunity to attend that funeral. Guilt? Perhaps. If I look back onto the regrets of my past, failure to attend some of the funerals of friends stands out. Guilt is part of the reason for my regrets, but also I wanted to give them one last ‘goodbye.’ I failed to deliver and now I am living with that ‘guilt.’ Yes, and maybe folks reading this comment will say that I’m just an old broad who doesn’t know better. But I do know better. Attend funerals. Yes, we do have a moral obligation to do so.
Occassion ally, oh, I mean often, Gen. Satterfield writes on this topic, so it should not be of any surprise to either those with experience in senior leadership or to his regular readers. I’ve been a reader now for many years and I will continue to do so, despite my heavy workload ensuring that the city of Baltimore continues to run properly, and despite the Democrat Party that has destroyed the heart of the city. My job is to bring it back and with the help of President Trump, we might just be able to do it. Please continue, sir, to write these kind of articles. We love them. ❤️
It’s great to see you back here making comments, Red.
ATTEND FUNERALS …. NUFF SAID
Sir, I one hundred percent agree.
Well said, Gen. Satterfield.
Gen. Satterfield, well said, and of course it is our moral responsibility. I started going to funerals early in my life and I absolutely hated being there. But as my dad always said, “Be there for them, and they’ll be there for you.” He was talking about all the relatives – and we had many – that would support you as long as you supported them. Death was a frequent visitor, so best stare him down by confronting death eye to eye. That is how to truly live. Don’t fear death; for we will all meet him someday and that day is sooner that maybe we want.
Bryan, well said. I know that Gen. Satterfield has likely been to more funerals and viewings that me, or maybe to many more than all of us. You will never get used to it. But we must show our support for those who have passed and those who are living. That is how we can live with ourselves.
Good comment, Bryan. Thanks.
Yes, and the fact this is a common theme with Gen. Doug Satterfield, it must mean alot to him and it means also alot to us also. Be at the funeral of those you know and those you most respect. That is how to be a good person and integrate your life into those circumstances where life is not longer there.
Sir, I know you’ve written about this topic on several occasions so it must be important to you. I guess that this is to be understandable, given that you were in combat. Sadly, we all lose friends and aquintences during our lifetime, and as we age, those loses do accumulate. Let us all pray for their souls and learn the lesson that our lives will be short, so that we must remain good people at all times. So, when we go to meet our Lord in Heaven, we are prepared and have already made our peace with Him.
Condolences for the loss.