[July 27, 2023] If you have an argument with a family member, and you “win” (by any measure of your choice), you have not won. Period. As an early teenager, I had a nasty argument with my mom over money. My logic in arguing with her was flawless. I won easily. It was a slam dunk, and everyone in my family who witnessed it said I had easily beaten my mom. I smiled. She cried.
At that moment, I knew I had lost everything. My realization came suddenly, and it shocked me to my core.
Seeing my mother cry because of something I did, was my most shameful moment. I had “won” the argument. But not only did I lose, but I was crushed because there is a clear, rational rule that always applies to families. You cannot win an argument with your family. That day, I grew up and became a man. Make your mom cry, and you are a dirtbag, par excellence. I was a dirtbag. My brain started to work and I realized I was a fool for my actions.
Of course, I apologized immediately. But the damage was already done, and no amount of groveling (which my mom would not want anyway) would make my mom’s hurt go away. Hurting a family member, emotionally or physically, is simply unacceptable and perhaps even evil. Your mom? Your mom is the very last person you can hurt.
You can’t win an argument with your family.
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